This is done 5 minutes ago, will need revisions. It may make it to the third book,
which I guess means I started it today…first day of my new year, one year older.
I read a headline, as I do everyday, and thought, “Shit, that’s awful”.
Then I thought, I have been thinking that for years. Is there no reprieve?
Here is what I thought after the first initial horror. Doesn’t matter what the first headline was, they
are all the same.

Headlines
Dubai, 22/4/2010

What is it this intake of breath
the word fuck hissed as if shock was
new to this body
as if this news was new to this body
what is it this slight widening of nostrils flare, tongue bloated inside
lips burnt in despair, too laden with history to
envision present, what is it, this gaping stare at jumbled remembrance-

–deported from west bank to gaza- IDF pass law- apartheid
state blossoms- this

-bodies shoveled by bulldozer to mass graves-
this

-girl, 12 yrs old,
found dead on way to market-
this

-sniper tshirt draws belly of arab womb is target
twice successful-
Where do all the tents go?
– land grab graphs- walls through a father’s face
sullen concrete of his seed-
what is this

-plume of
white toxic hides shadows of the daily exterminated we–
from where does it rise up, like bile, like vomit, like
acid- this surprise?
Surprise?

This has always been the way it is,
this has always been.

In 1983,
a 5-year old refugee slams her body on a warm bed, revolts a tantrum when
adults kindly confirm…‘They have to call it Israel now, honey”… what does that child
know of stolen family?
Children learn.

What is this
this intake of breath at headlines- gaza ramallah jenin-
-netanyahu dines at white house- clinton says security first- abu mazen seeks presidency- old man dies of lack of electricity-
I have heartburn where I once had pulse, I have
spasms of stomach too full to chew this new
news I digest no more,
what is it, this surprise…”how could it possibly get worse”

-fuck-

–they slaughtered over 400 children just last year alone–